Wednesday, March 7, 2012

IPA, Cold Spring Brewery

This is an IPA from Cold Spring Brewery (MN)
This is a Big Ass Can (TM). Super-size, the Big Gulp, Gravedigger (obligatory Monster Truck reference). Minnesota's answer to the Foster's "Oil Can"? This gargantuan monster holds a whopping 1 quart of beer or 32 fluid ounces. Incredulously retails for around $3! You know it's gonna be good at that price!

Label features a rather garish scene of the great outdoors and reads thusly :
Cold Fusion Filled (I have no idea what that means)?
Brewed with Glacial Mineral Water (true dat - Cold Spring water source requires no additional filtration)
Double Pints 4 x 8oz servings (who drinks an 8oz serving anyway)?
IPA, dry hopped, double hopped (sounds impressive)
6.5% ABV 70 IBU's
1 Quart, 32 FL oz (946ml)

"Look at the heid on it....

This seemed a perfect time to break out the "Big Whopper" Schmidt Glass. Big Ass beer has met it's match! Picked this beauty up at an antique store about ten years ago. Note to self - when Googling "Schmidt Whopper" do not be surprised if the search engine returns some rather questionable results...ahem...for the record let me state that  have never heard of a "Wendy Whoppers". Although I am intrigued.....

Let's get to to the pour. Wow! Dark yellow/amber with a massive cruddy foamy head. Meringue.

"Look at the size of that boy's head. It's like an orange on a toothpick"! (with apologies to "So I Married an Axe Murderer").

Honestly, their are more suds on this beer than the local laundromat (guffaw). I know from my home brewing days I'd have been thrilled to see this level of fermentation of the wort in the carboy (krausen is the brewing term) but in the finished product not so appealing.


Initial impression is this tastes better than it looks. Tastes a little sweet. I wasn't able to detect the presence of any hops and despite claims of 70 IBU's no bitterness whatsoever. I'd liken this to a pale ale/lager rather than an IPA.

As a beer a C- . For an IPA a D.

This is a perfect beer to crack open after a trip for some camo supplies to Mills Fleet Farm. A perfect transition from Busch Light? Perfect to snuggle up to while watching the 100th lap of a Nascar race or catching an episode of "Hillbilly Handfishin'".
This is a "Man's Man's Man's Man's Man's Beer" (I'm pretty sure this is what James Brown was singing about - poetic license from the author to add the extra "man" for emphasis by the way).

Another look at the "Whopper". I believe that is a Northern Pike.

More about the brewery:

Cold Spring Brewery
219 Red River Avenue North
P.O. Box 476
Cold Spring, MN 56320
'PH: (320) 685-8686
FAX: (320) 685-8318

Extra Credit:
  • Founded in 1874
  • Fastest growing brewery in Minnesota
  • #1 Energy drink and Speciality drink producer in the world.
  • Contract brews for several different breweries including 21st Amendment (San Francisco,CA and until recently Lift Bridge (Stillwater, MN) was brewed here).
  • They are currently in the process of a $15M expansion of a tap house/brewery that will concentrate solely on craft beer, called Third Street Brew house (this IPA was brewed at the original brewery). No hops were harmed in the brewing of this beer, but what did you expect for $3!


  1. This is one of the most hilarious beer reviews I've ever read. Thanks for the laughs!!

  2. LOL! That was perfect!

  3. DUDE! Where'd ya find that can?

    As a collector, I gotta have it.